Dont give up
by greys101
Summary: Short MerDer scene in the hospital after Some Kind of Miracle
1. Chapter 1

Okay this is how i imagine the scene with mer/der at the end of 'Some kind of Miracle' when Mer/Der are lying in the hospital bed together..

Derek silently held Meredith in the tiny hospital thinking about what they had just been through. He almost lost her, God what would he of done if he lost her? He loved her, in a way he had never loved anyone else. She defined him, he based his life on being her knight and shining whatever. He was so consumed in his thoughts that he could hardly sleep. He just cherished holding her as he tenderly rubbed his hand along Merediths forearm.

Did she want to die? Derek wondered, hating the thought immediately. But he couldn't help it, she knew how to swim, Meredith **knew **how to swim. It didn't make sense to him, had he not kept her happy enough..at least enough to convince her that she is anything but ordinary. Thinking back on Ellis, he felt guilt, he yelled at her mother but she deserved it, she needed to know that she broke Meredith.

Derek was too consumed into his thoughts that he didn't realized Meredith stirring beside him.

"Hey..you're awake" Meredith whispered gently as she shifted her body so she could lay on her back while facing him.

"Yeah" he returned with a weak smile, reaching over to kiss her cheek before propping his head onto his left hand

"I'm okay, everything is okay" she said sensing the worry in his eyes,

It was amazing how they connected, never having to say a word, they could both communicate with just their look.

Derek drew a long sigh not knowing how to start, or how she would react, he knew Meredith loved him with all her heart, he felt it everyday but today after everything he just needed to hear it. His head leaning in sideways with his hand still against his black curls, he reached with his other hand to cup Meredith's face, slowly tracing the edges of her jaw bone.

"Mer, you still love me don't you? Do I make you happy? I know I've hurt you a lot in the past but you…

Before he could even finish his sentence Meredith silenced him with a soft kiss , "Derek" she whispered softly. "I have intimacy issues, stupid right? God that sounds so stupid"

"It's not stupid"

"No, it really is Derek, I don't want to any more… I want to be able to love you and not hold back" she said raising her voice a little above a whisper. "I love you Derek, and you make me happy, happier than I've ever been but just, just let me get used to this feeling…..I'm new at this remember?" she playfully added

A small smile tugged at end of Dereks lips which soon vanished remembering the thoughts of her drowning. "Mer.." he began as his hand crept up brushing it through her hair softly. "You're a good swimmer…." he stated in a questioning tone.

Her eyes unable to look at Dereks fell back on her hands as she tugged on the edges of the hospital blanket.

"I got tired…"

"Meredith"

"I tried Derek, I did, it was cold and I was fighting a losing battle so I gave up..I just figured..what's the point?"

"Me, I'm the point" lowering his head once again giving her a tender kiss as his hand found hers knitting their fingers together…his lips slowly parting from hers "Don't ever think about giving up ever again"

Yeah super duper short, sorry about that. But review and tell me if its any good and ill continue, if no one likes it i'll just toss it..


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: i dont own greys, i wish i did. Oh and if i did..it would just be mer/der the entire time :)**

**Thanks for the great reviews guys!! i apperciate it!! **

It was early the next morning and Alex, Izzie, and George were in the locker room getting dressed for their 5 am rounds.

"Hey Alex have you gone in to see Meredith yet?" she asked catching a quick glance in Georges direction before her face was hidden as her scrub top went over her head.

"No, Dr. Shepherd won't leave her side..I don't wanna you know disturb anything…." he replied rising his eyebrow

"Seriously Alex, she almost died yesterday… you think their already having sex" Izzie asked sarcastically "You're a pig" she slammed her locker shut

"Oh come on it's…" he was cut off by Christina's loud entrance

"Shut up and get out of my way evil spawn" she snapped making her way to her locker

"Hey watch it crackwhore, don't take it out on me because you can't get here on time"

"Your never late" Izzie added as she leaned against the lockers taking a crunchy bite into her apple

"Burke wouldn't shut up..he kept talking about feelings all night, seriously feelings, I show a little emotion and he wants more" a frustrated Christina was frantically throwing her scrubs on and closing her locker

"Christina you guys are getting married, you can't hide anything from your spouse"

"Oh thanks you've been married for what? A week? And your already giving out advice"

"Yeah married in Vegas without even a second thought…." Izzie muttered immediately noticing the cold look George was shooting her before turning back to Christina

"You have feelings Christina"

"No she doesn't Iz, she's like one of those Chihuahua dogs that just know how to bark…

"No, I don't bark, I bite" she growled in Alex's direction as she made her away to the door with

The others following her .

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Mer's POV

"I'm fine Derek, seriously, I feel great" I argued back with him, seriously this hospital room was making me cloister phobic...and I really did feel fine.

"Get back into bed, your not going anywhere until your discharged" Derek answered back distracted by reading my chart at the foot of my bed. He looked sexy..his hair all disheveled from just waking up and still in the clothes from the night before. A whiff of Derek certainly wasn't enough. I needed more, I wanted more.

"No, I'm fine" I said firmly holding onto my IV as I stood up.

"Mer, stop being so stubborn…"

Suddenly the door whipped open as Bailey and the other four interns made their way in.

Oh great, just perfect. Rounds, I should have known.

"Doctor Grey!!" Her voice booming over making it very clear she was the authority in the room

" I advise you to get into that bed immediately if you know what's good for you!"

God she was a scary woman when she yelled.

"Dr. Bailey I feel great! Really fantastic even.." I said in my most convincing voice while looking at Derek hoping he'd help me out.

"You were on the verge of dying and giving everyone else here a heart attack so get back into bed before I really kill you" Bailey responded with both her hands on her hips.

I had no choice, there was no arguing with Dr.Bailey, I climbed right back into the uncomfortable hospital bed. I hated it, I wanted my bed, my sheets, my room.

"Give me that" Bailey snapped as she snatched my chart from Derek's hands.

A look of amusement played on Derek's features as he smiled at her ability to make anyone listen to her, he made his way up to the side of my bed leaning into me to give me a kiss on the cheek. I could feel the rough exterior of his cheek rubbing against mine from his lack of shaving the past couple of days.

"Looks like your in good hands here, I'm just going to go and take care of a couple of things, I'll be back" he assured me softly

"Hmm yeah…and shave…"

"Hmm and shave, just for you" he winked as he made his way past Bailey and the others running his hand through his messy black curls attempting to make them look decent.

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Derek's POV

I closed Meredith's room door shut. I was tired and really needed to change my clothes before I went to go find the chief about getting a couple of days off. I needed to keep an eye on Meredith, I believe her when she says that she has a new appreciation for life but still I wasn't planning on leaving her side for the next few days.

I made my way to the elevators which was difficult considering every other nurse slowed their pace as they passed me to give me a sympathetic look. I was a wreck yesterday..a complete wreck. I loved my Meredith, I've known that since the first time I saw her. But yesterday was a my wake up call..Meredith wasn't just figuratively 'my breath of fresh air'. She made me feel alive, but yesterday….yesterday I was dead.

The elevators made a loud ding as the doors slowly parted, I looked up to see Addison staring straight back at me.

"Addie…hey" I greeted her as I walked in giving her a small smile before I turned around pressing the floor button .

"Hey" she eyed me to see if I was alright as she shifted to the side to allow me to stand next to her,

"She is doing good, shes okay" I remembered how Addison was actually there for me helping me pull through when I almost broke down. I couldn't help but feel a little awkward at the situation, my ex wife witnessed just how much I loved Meredith and she still helped me.

"That's good.." She looked down tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

She felt awkward..I could tell.

"Um, thank you…thank you for you know helping me"

Just then the elevator doors dinged open

She made her way out and turn back putting her hand on side of the elevator door to prevent it from closing

"You love her Derek, I knew she'd make it, she had to make it"

And with that the elevator doors shut.

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"Chief, chief!!" I yelled across the hospital terrace swiftly walking past people.

"Doctor..oh Derek..hows Meredith?" he asked as his eyebrows knitted together in concern

"No no shes good, shes good…how are you?"

"What?'

"Richard, I know…I know you and ellis..well..how are you?"

"She's better off…" he said softly looking away

"Right, im sorry, Chief.. I think I should be with Meredith these next couple of days..keep an eye on her and help her out with the funeral arrangements.

"Okay Derek, no problem"

"Thank you" I smiled sadly at him, I know he loved Ellis I could see the hurt in his eyes he quickly turned on his heel and made his way down to his office.

I turned back to head over to elevators, I just had one more thing to do before I could go back to Meredith's room. I missed her..I was sure Izzie or Christina were keeping her company but I just couldn't wait to back into her room and lay next to her and just hold her.

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Meredith's POV

"So what Christina, Burke loves you he just wants you to open up a little more"

"I don't open up mer, you know that, what's his problem anyway hes a guy I thought guys don't like talking about feelings''

"He's going to be your husband!" I replied emphasizing the word husband

"Whatever Burkes more like a wife!"

I couldn't help but laugh, yeah I definitely needed more Christina too.

Just then the door cracked open and Derek poked his head in, "Hey ladies…"

"Mcdreamy..just in time I got to go meet my wife, bye Mer" she said quickly grabbing her bag off the side chair as she passed Derek heading out the door.

"Wife?" he asked curiously , raising his eyebrows as he came close to sit on the edge of my bed.

"Uhh, don't ask….what did you have to take care of anyway?" I asked. He had changed into a dark pair of blue jeans and a navy blue sweater. His hair looked perfectly moussed and I could tell he was cleanly shaven. The nicknaame 'Mcdreamy' really was fitting for him.

"I'm taking the next few days off to be with you" he replied giving me a kiss on the cheek

"You don't need to do that you know, im.."

"Fine" He cut me off "Yeah I know mer, your always fine"

"Well I am" I protested "You don't need to take off, I know your really busy"

"Meredith, I need you to start talking, and not just push me out by saying your fine, so um.." He took my hand in his rubbing his thumb along the top of my hand "I talked to Dr. Henderson today and I made an appointment for you"

"Dr Henderson?" I've heard that name before..probably wrote her name down to refer patients to. I tried to rack my brain to figure what it was she did.

"Yeah..the appointment is tomorrow morning"

"Wait a minute" it dawned on me "That's a therapist Derek..and I don't need a therapist thanks anyway" I moved my hand from his quickly and cross my arms against my chest.

"Mer, it'd be good for you….you need someone to talk to you have been through a lot and a therapist will help" he pleaded

"Derek! I do not need a therapist, I am fine!" Was he serious, actually referring me to a therapist!?! I definitely did not need a shrink to help me.

"Well you don't talk to me, you don't let me in, so this is an alternative, baby just listen to me..a therapist is actually good for you..I used to go to one you know"

"Good, cause after I'm through with you, you'll need her again" I can't believe he suggested I needed a shrink..he is ridiculous. "Wait why did you go to a therapist?"

He let out a sigh. "Addison made me go to couples therapy a few times"

"Oh that worked out well..I guess they do work" I let out sarcastically "And how did you like it?"

"Okay… I hated it" he admitted moving his hand to my forehead and rubbing my hair back. "But that was different..I was too distracted by thoughts of you to pay any attention to what the doc was saying" he smirked.

"Thoughts of me uh..what kind of thoughts?" I slyly smiled up at him forgetting my anger for a second.

"Oh wouldn't you like to know Dr. Grey" he smiled. His smile always seemed to make me melt.

"Mer, seriously though" Derek gave me a serious look before continuing "Dr. Henderson can be good for you"

Okay the anger….just came back.

"Derek, no I am not going to a shrink..its not happening so just drop it or go away"

"I'm not going away..now scoot over so I can lay next to you" he said standing up to take his shoes off .

"No, go away" I said reluctantly pouting up at him

"Mer…move over"

"No"

"Baby, I'm here, I'm everywhere remember..and im not going anywhere..I'm your knight and shining whatever for life so deal with it..now move over because your knight is tired" he smiled looking into my eyes all dreamily.

I hate the power he has over me because I found myself scooting over to make room for him, I felt his warm body shift against mine making him self comfortable and wrapping his protective arms around me. I felt safe. His face rubbed against mine as he reached over to kiss my cheek. "I love you Mer" he whispered as his breath tickled my ear sending shivers down my spine.

"I'll work on my intimacy issues Der, I promise, without a shrink though" I promised him

"Deal" he answered taking my hand in his as I drifted off to sleep.

**Okay so there goes ch.2 I hope you guys like it so far. Derek is wanting Mer to open up more so he is aware of what she is feeling because he doesn't want mer ever giving up on life again..christina is dealing with burke wanting her to open up too…Like burke said..these women are very different women!**

**I'll try to update tomorrow, I hope you guys are enjoying the story.**

**Review please!!**


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